Tickle My What?

PAX: Aaarrrggghhh, Bleep, Jiminy, Sally, Sex Panther, Slushii, Special Sauce, Teasip, Ultra
QIC: Coach K
AO: Cole Park
Mileage: 3.5 (5 if you’re Sally/YHC)

SSH x20; IST x15
Short lap around Cole Park

Tha Thang:
Paint-the-Lines; run a lap
Alligator Merkins; lap
Nipplers; lap
Irkens; lap
Carolina Drydocks; lap


Threw in a Native American run at one point. Waiting PAX had to run suicides while waiting for the six or do burpees as punishment.

Sally was the only PAX man enough to endure an extra run this morning (down Travis, loop back up the Katy Trail). Good to have him back out “almost as good as new” (his words). Aaarrrggghhh sent a warning text about rolling in late, but he interestingly enough beat Sally and YHC back from the run before the workout started. Not sure how many laws were broken in Uptown this morning, but YHC is guessing quite a few. Ain’t illegal ‘les you get caught. By 0532 we were all disappointed to realize that Rump Roast and Shifty would not be joining us.

YHC disclaimed the workout, nothing too fancy here before taking off on our first lap to show the fellas the way. We rallied back at the tennis courts, and YHC explained the rules for today: if you finish the run early you do suicides until the six is in or punishment burpees. Goal was to keep moving the entire morning limiting breathing/recovery time. We ultimately did zero burpees, which Teasip lauded YHC for. Such a rare treat from YHC, must’ve been the whiskey.

We did a quick PTL during which YHC lost a shoe. Teasip noticed a rapid recovery by YHC to remove the shoe flawlessly and jokes were had about YHC’s ability to undress so quickly. It bodes well for me that speed impresses people. We ran another lap. Then did some merkins…and a lap. Then some nipplers…and a lap. Almost felt like a KTT.

After the Irkens, Teasip and his inquisitive mind tried to pick up on the theme. Him and Sauce tried to come up with words for “A NI…”. YHC casually mentioned they forgot a letter and YHC believe “PANTIES” was the first suggestion after that. It was after this lap, or soon thereafter we got our inaugural Chippendale of 2020 from Teasip showing off the wedding bod. Someone threw out something about staying in the lights of the tennis court complimenting each other while in a circle, which Slushii and YHC agreed was descriptive of a circle jerk. We took off on our run not looking back – no one needed to be a part of what was going on back there.

We finished the Carolina drydocks, and Sauce and Teasip finally caught on to the word Panic and immediately yelled out “Panic! At the Disco”. Great band, Brendon Urie still going strong. Though that wasn’t the theme.  

As if a circle jerk wasn’t “friendly” enough, the phrase “whatever tickles your fancy” was thrown out to which someone offered to “tickle YHC’s fancy”. A motif that would acme at “milking the prostate” by the end of the workout. Very affectionate group this morning as at one point someone offered a hug to YHC in response to “circle up near me”. Must’ve been something in the air, or YHC’s mood was really something new.

Some ribbing of Ultra and Jiminy to push them harder didn’t seem to be working, so we threw in a ½ mile Native American run at the end of which Jiminy and Ultra got into a sprint to finish first between them. After proving they could sprint, YHC really dug into them on the rest of the runs. We did suicides instead of a run for another round during which the “tickle your fancy” fiasco ensued. YHC did not give clear and verbal consent, nor did any other PAX to my knowledge. YHC heard the word “butthole” out of context. Not sure what was going on there, but it was a conversation that was had.

We wrapped up with an AYG lap resulting in us ending a minute over time for which YHC apologizes. Gave a quick debrief about pushing ourselves and each other and keeping up the momentum going into the TID18K this weekend. Hopefully this morning was a good balance of “pushy” Coach K without veering into the crankiness territory. YHC thinks he towed that line pretty well, but open to dissenting opinions. Thanks again for putting up with a little extra pressure this morning. We all got better because of it covering close to 3.5 miles by most people’s watches.

Aaarrrggghhh asked what time the drinking was starting on Saturday for the CSAUP, to which YHC responded that YHC was doing a shot of whiskey every hour during the event. PAX were supportive of the idea thinking it would keep my happy, and apparently everyone wins with a happy Coach K. Jiminy gave us a half-Chippendale during the COT as we went about our merry Mondays.

The Heist

PAX: AlrightAlright, Ant Man, Boom!erang, Draper, Icebox, Ina, Livemau5, Oatmeal, Pepper, Plus One, PowPow, Rump Roast, Shifty McCoy, Toto, Special Sauce, Squints (FNG), Sweet Baby,
QIC: Coach K (colloquially Mastermind)
AO: Highland Park / Park Cities / SMU
Disclaimer: Given to extend to injuries to any person. Specifically held people strictly liable for any damage to my truck.

SSH x15; IST x15

Tha Thang:
See attached routes. There were two separate groups who ran unique routes with unique exercises. One launched from Burleson and the other group launched from Caruth.

Team 1 – Alright Alright, Ant Man, Squints, Toto
Team 2 – Ina, Livemau5, Pepper, Plus One, Pow Pow, Special Sauce
Team 3 – Boomerang, Coach K, Draper, Oatmeal, Icebox, Rump Roast, Shifty McCoy, Sweet Baby

Before YHC gets too far down this verbose post, I’m soliciting honest feedback for these types of workouts. If y’all want this to be more than a once-a-year thing, then YHC can make it happen. Putting this together was genuinely fun for me, so if the people enjoy it then YHC is happy to deliver. Also soliciting any opinions on changes/tweaks to make the experience better for the group and from a competitive standpoint. Livemau5 and Boom!erang mentioned at Bubba’s that the intro/preblast was a fun selling point, which I’m glad to hear.

0530. YHC almost got arrested this morning. We’ll start there. Apparently in Highland Park, using chalk on sidewalks is considered “graffiti”. YHC talked his way out, and then had to skillfully dodge the fuzz at 6 other locations to get the arena set.

0645. PAX started trickling in, and a few PAX were late (to be addressed later). Teams were randomly sorted, so they don’t align with the February teams. Instructions were given, and after a brief cell phone number snafu the Caruth drop team was informed that we were in fact driving to Caruth to launch. Icebox was given command of the Burleson drop, and two cars full of men drove to Caruth right on schedule to get things kicked off. That said, the adventures of our Burleson drop are unbeknownst to me. Rumor has it, Shifty McCoy got to ride on PAX back during some bear crawls.

0700. Brief warm-up before getting things started. It was at this point, we learned that reading every word of the instructions given would be the demise of the day as it ultimately was for one unfortunate group. We knocked out some reps before a 1.3 mile run through Caruth, down Turtle Creek, to Williams Park. Alright Alright and Toto jaywalked across Lover’s, and the rest of the PAX had a conversation about breaking the laws. As YHC had been threatened with arrest for breaking the law, didn’t have much of a leg to stand on. Once we arrived at the Pavilion, YHC was informed the northern part is technically “Goar Park”. Whoops. The Pavilion is a good landmark, so all PAX arrived accordingly.

0710. By the time we arrived, the Burleson drop team had all received instructions to send us the exercises we needed to do. Not to brag, but the timing of this whole thing worked out about as perfectly as YHC could hope. The race was designed to keep the groups connected despite running different routes. Likewise, we had instructions to send them exercises to do at their next stop. We knocked out 60 quick reps at “Goar” Park before running a lonely route up University Blvd to the main quad. The stoplights were not favorable to 4 PAX who got caught by traffic.

0722. Our group had the unfortunate task of crawl bearing up the quad stairs. Pretty simple, right? Alright Alright and Toto had a sizeable lead at this point, but they were still in sight on the way to La Madeleine. Pepper pulled an interesting maneuver over the fence and through the bushes as a shortcut to La Madeleine. We’re not quite sure how much time this saved, but most PAX just ran around. We had a quick debate again on the rules of off-roading it, and there was nothing that explicitly precluded one from leaving the sidewalk, so.

0727. Here’s where “The Office” trivia failed every group. The instructions were for our group to call the others and say “The Tea in Nepal is Very Hot” to which the other group had a list of options to respond. The response (if correct) meant a 10-count, but the wrong responses meant 15 burpees. Only one team managed to make the right choice, and of course it was the team with the lead going in. AA and Toto took off towards the track, while the rest of us suffered through a few extra burpees. This is also where YHC had his run-in with the law.

0734. On the way into the track was a symbol, but it was for the other group. Pepper was the only one to mistakenly jot it down (symbols were color coded by team). We all got to the track and some soccer/track nonsense was going on. They had lights and cameras – it was a whole ordeal. We got an extra breather as we had to wheelbarrow 100m. On the way out, teams ran right by the actual logo and had to circle back, which gave YHC’s time to catch up a bit. Pepper realized the error of his ways, and the three teams were on a neck and neck jail break up to Burleson.

0740. Just like YHC drew it up, the Burleson drop team had arrived only moments before the Caruth teams. Teams got together to figure out the 5-digit code to break into the truck. Team 1 was the first in the truck, and they got a letter (that was perfectly burnt around the edges and dyed because YHC goes the extra mile). Their team started on a final jailbreak to the getaway car at the top of the Burleson garage. Team 2 soon after got into the truck follow by YHC’s team. Now, YHC noticed that the actual treasure (a sandbag) was still left in the car. Team 1 broke into the truck but left the goods. All three teams were on a final dash up the ramps, and Team 3 (with the bag) strolled up to a posing Team 1 where the unfortunate news that they’d missed the treasure was announced. Team 1 was the fastest team arriving at the getaway car (an exotic hot wheels) before anyone else.

0747. Fast forward a bit, and YHC realized we had 13 minutes of a beatdown left. Remember the stragglers who rolled up late? We did 5 burpees for each of them (totaling 15) followed by some Mary.

Heels to Heaven. Bear Crawl down a ramp.
Freddie Mercury. Bear Crawl down a ramp. Run to the bottom of the garage.
Flutter Kicks, LBCs, Penguin Crunches.
AYG sprint to Burleson.
Heels to Heaven.
Body Destroyer.

0800. Now we had an FNG to name. We got a lot of ammunition from saving lives, CPR, working in the same pit as feature in Ferris Bueller. Ultimately, we settled on Squints. Since the group this morning was shy on their Sandlot knowledge let me break that down. Squints faked drowning to get CPR from Wendy Peppercorn and steal a kiss. After all that, YHC announced that we had smashed the weekly attendance record by 10+. It was also a record for a Coach K Q. On top of all that, we are at 5 FNGs for the month. 5 more to go before Oatmeal takes his dive.

After several trips to deliver people to the abandoned cars at Caruth, 9 (maybe 10) PAX rallied at Bubba’s where the “treasure” snafu was debated a little bit more in good fun. We talked about the workout, the Highland Park popo, the Ticket announcement coming in a couple days, spoilers for 1917, and the Crescent/Uptown area.

If I haven’t lost you yet, thanks to everyone who showed up this morning and busted their ass. It means a lot to me when people engage with these non-traditional workouts, so I appreciate y’all.


Dude, Where Are We?

PAX: Rump Roast, Special Sauce
QIC: Coach K
AO: Cole Park

SSH x20, IST x10

Tha Thang:
-Moseyed down Cole Ave, stopped for some Gorilla Squats at the light
-Continued on to Gloria’s for Bonnie Blairs
-Crawl up this steep ass ramp, claymakers at the top, bear crawl down
-Turn right on Hall Street over to Turtle Creek Park for some of this and some of that
-Weave through the park up to Oak Lawn and back over to Turtle Creek/Katy Trail
-Back up Lemmon with some hill sprints
-Final run up Cole Ave to the rally point

Dense dense fog this morning, as the drive in was not ideal. There was a distinct moment when YHC realized “if something’s in the road, it’s gettin’ hit”. Otherwise the weather wasn’t too shabby. Rump Roast rolled in fashionably late missing the first part of the disclaimer. He’s heard it enough times, and YHC likes to think we’re close enough for him not to sue me regardless. A simple OG warm up and off we went. As soon as we started running, Rump made a comment about not expecting running. Oh, my sweet summer child. (For never having seen GoT, YHC quotes this a lot…)

We ran down Cole and YHC was hoping the light gods would be favorable to Rump, but they were not all morning. As soon as Rump pulled up to a light it switched to green and onward we pressed. We paused at Lemmon for some Gorilla Squats and then carried onto Gloria’s for some Bonnie Blairs. Continuing down Cole, one of them noticed what might be the steepest grade in Dallas (only slightly exaggerating, but honestly the uptown area is packed with hills and grades both natural and parking garages). YHC immediately took to crawl bearing it because what else are you supposed to do with a monstrous incline? Sauce mentioned the workout studio around that area is packed with girls, but alas, none were spotted. A few claymakers in and Rump made a comment about his hips, which unfortunately would plague him the rest of the workout. We bear crawled down the ramp and onward to glory we ran. 

YHC believes at this point Rump Roast started cussing him out, which means YHC was doing his job. We turned right on Hall to explore the Turtle Creek park area. The fog was rather unforgivable and YHC had to lean on Sauce for directions. Even then, we got turned around a bit. We finally found an expansive area, but we only had time for a drive-by (we’ll be sure to revisit in a future Q). Navigating the park, we cut through some swank west end area where the house/mansion sits above what is presumably the servants parking garage. Must be nice. This is where YHC admitted that he got turned around, and it took a few seconds for Lewis and Clark to circle back to Lemmon passing a nice lawyer’s office and some fancy condos (surprisingly these high-rise condos rent out for only $2,200). 

Turning left on Lemmon we were on the home stetch. Sauce made me sprint up Lemmon Ave (yes up, it’s a hill). We circled back for Rump and carried on our wayward son. How many Kansas references can I shove in here? Whether there was peace when we were done is up for debate. We talked about the Katy Trail on our final Pilgrimage north commenting on potential runs Down the Road to Reverchon or runs up the Lonely Street La Madeleine – guess you could say Cole Park is a promising Miracle Out of Nowhere. But that’s just What’s on my Mind. Also discussed F3 Austin, and Rump’s progress down in California closer to The Wall and the People of the South Wind.

Only ran a couple minutes over, and we did some F3 broga with Sauce and Rump Standing Beside Me. Seemed to help loosen things up again, but YHC admitted to Rump that bad hips are what make us Hopelessly Human. That was just my unsolicited Two Cents Worth. We prayed it out encouraging Rump safe travels To the Other Side and to Stay Out of Trouble. We’ll only be Away from You till your beatdown on Saturday. Not like we’ll be Dust in the Wind by then. 

I know that was not nearly as fun for y’all as it was for me, but I do not care. 

Fashionably Late

PAX: Aaarrrggghhh, AlrightAlright, Cookies N Cream (FNG), Froggy (B’ham), Icebox, Oatmeal, Sex Panther, Sweet Baby, Teasip
QIC: Coach K, Ultra

We don’t know because we were both late…

Tha Thang (YHC):
21, 15, 9 of thrusters and burpees (21 reps of both, then 15, and 9)

Jacob’s Ladder with OG Manmakers (burpee, push up, clean, squat, press, two lunges) and burpee jump overs with the block

Tha Thang (Ultra):
Partner 1 runs across field while other PAX does reps
– 50 double count side leg raises (each side)
– 100 double count shoulder presses

Mosey to flag for ring of fire v-ups with chest press (200x)
Rugby SUs and LBCs to round us out

In true co-Q fashion, 0/2 showed up on time as other PAX were instructed to tell the other to start first. Whoops. Not the ideal impression for an FNG, but his name might be cause for bigger concern…Teasip was kind enough to lead the warm-up before the Qs rolled up.

We grabbed the blocks and made it to the field. Pretty sure the thruster/burpee combo is more despised than a traditional YHC Burpee Beatdown, but that’s up for the PAX to decide. We had some side exercises going while the six wrapped up the circuit before moving to what was probably a worse series of exercies. YHC demonstrated a true manmaker (includes two lunges while holding the press). A couple of PAX requested follow up demonstrations, and we’re at the point in F3 where YHC assumes they’re being difficult and not serious. My bad. Time got called and Ultra took the reigns.

Mumblechatter was very scarce this morning, except for the number of times PAX asked Ultra to clarify he said “double-count” every exercise. Could not count the times on two hands. We powered on, but, again, it was a really quiet group this morning. There were a lot of comments about the hip flexors during the side leg raises, which is apparently a muscle none of us at F3 ever use. After the mini-Dora, we moseyed back to the flag for the longest ring of fire in Dallas history. Holding the block over your head and your legs at 6 inches, we went around doing a v-up. “We’re going to 200” was a nice warning that no one thought was serious. But alas…it was.

We wrapped up with the naming ceremony, where our lovely FNG gave us plenty of ammunition when, in describing his life, was bold enough to use the word “Lactation”. This overshadowed any references to his hometown in upstate NY and his two daughters. After circling around breast pumps, lactation, and milk, we finally got to “Cookies n Cream”. Ask him about it…you won’t regret the story.

Thanks for braving the weather this morning.


PAX: Aaarrrggghhh, Alright Alright, Draper, Sex Panther
QIC: Coach K
AO: Burleson Parking Garage

SSH x20
IST x20
Cotton Pickers x10

Tha Thang:
Ascending BLIMPS with bear crawls (Burpees, Lunges, Irkens, Merkins, Peter Parkers, Squats)

10-9-…-1 Burpees, BBSU, Squats

Thankfully lightning forced us to merge our workouts today, otherwise Aaarrrggghhh would’ve been left with a few good men and YHC would’ve had to workout alone. Skies looked clear at midnight flying in, but the sky fell out this morning. We couldn’t decide if it was the weather or rampant vagititus that kept everyone home today. Aaarrrggghhh decided to merge the workouts, so YHC put something together that probably was not in the back of the Katy Trailers’ minds. 

Aaarrrggghhh had a hilarious pun/theme workout, so the next time he leads a Katy Trail workout all y’all best be there. 

Gimpy (YHC) asked Aaarrrggghhh to lead some side-straddle hops for the people before YHC took over. We started with a bear crawl up the first ramp followed by 5 burpees. Then bear crawled another ramp followed by 5 burpees. PAX meandered off at this point, and YHC just waited for the lost sheep to realize Gimpy hadn’t moved. We kept on with the lunges and so on up the garage. It was truly a “hot box” kinda day despite the absence of running. YHC mixed up the usual ISTs with some Irkens, which only lasted for two rounds. It was also at this point that YHC got called out for errant multiples of 5, to which YHC blames the jetlag. 

The Peter Parkers opened up a conversation about F3 disabilities as YHC has a bum foot. Oatmeal has a bum wrist (which for some reason precluded him from a running workout). Alright Alright now has a bad hip flexor, which he blames on his dog (really just old age, but we’ll let grandpa say what he wants). We all powered on before the 10 to 1 circuit. Lots of comments about disrespecting the tail bone when having to do big boi sit ups. We offered him a spot in the grass outside. COT ended with a long discussion about kids.

Not the ideal morning, but we rallied on and had a good time (to my knowledge). Cole Park launches tomorrow. Weather looks questionable tomorrow as well, but YHC believes vagisil can be found at your local grocery store. 

Where is Williams Park?

PAX: Chairman Mao, Island Time, Oatmeal, Plus One, Sally, Sex Panther, Special Sauce, Teasip
QIC: Coach K
AO: Burleson – Williams Park
Mileage: 4.35

Disclaimer: given quickly but thoroughly for AlrightAlright and YHC
Warm-O-Rama: none, we had places to be

Tha Thang:
-Run down University Blvd to Williams Park Pavilion with a couple stops on the way
-Partner DORA with 50 burpees, 75 merkins, 100 squats
-Run to south portion of Williams Park for a Dirty McUno
-Run up McFarlin Dr back to the main quad at SMU with a couple stops on the way
-Jacob’s Ladder starting with 6 gorilla squats and 1 burpee
-AYG sprint up the Burleson parking garage
-Brief Mary and 10 burpees before moseying back for a 1-minute plank hold

YHC did some extra credit, which started off our lovely mumblechatter this morning getting called out for specifically creating a beatdown to avoid that. A little stressed this week, so YHC broke his own rule but still delivered a running intensive beatdown. PAX had some other comments about YHC he overheard, but we’ll let those fizzle out. YHC halted the chatter at 0700 on the nose and disclaimed the two workouts (disabled Alright Alright led a non-running alternative). The running group immediately took off. The run was your warm-up – best there ever was. PAX were surprised at the brevity of the intro and let their thoughts be heard before we stopped and did some SSH and ISTs on our route to Williams Park – you know, that place not close to Burleson. YHC promised Sally last night that we were going somewhere never before for a Saturday. Oatmeal and Special Sauce made hesitant jokes about running to Germany Park, but YHC will save that for a future workout.

Highland Park is notorious for quarter mile (slight exaggeration, but barely so) blocks, so there were only three brief stops for PAX to recover. A group of female runners caused us to part like the Red Sea, and they apologized saying “we’re just giving you extra time to catch your breath”. YHC responded that “they didn’t need it”. Pronoun choice was quickly noted, but YHC apologizes for nothing. We made it to the Pavilion and a few PAX reminisced about not having been to that AO in months before jumping right into the DORA. We started with 25, 50, 100 reps but YHC called an unfavorable audible because why the hell not? Once the six wrapped up, Island Time gave quite the rapid 10-count and off we ran to the southern portion of the park for a Dirty McUno with some Irkens, Derkins, and Dips. We carried on like wayward sons passing some really fine benches just around the corner. Everyone must’ve been a little delirious because we were all a little too impressed with the comparable comfort we could’ve been using.

Our trip back to Burleson was just as eventful. On the way to the first intersection Special Sauce called out that we need a six roundup. One of the PAX made YHC out to be the villain implying they should learn to run faster, which…we’ll circle back to in a short while. All the six were accounted for in true F3 fashion whereby 2-3 PAX who arrived early went back for the six while the rest were led in some ab/core exercise. This is the typical means by which PAX are picked up rather than the whole group returning – casual sidebar. We got caught at the longest light ever on Hillcrest before making our way to the quad staircase for a Jacob’s Ladder. Not too much chatter here except for some complaints when burpees were announced. There was a brief mention about Boy Scout politics before we got back to it. Sex Panther did us all proud EH’ing a Troop Leader (Scout Leader? Not sure what the title is). Oatmeal offered up a business card, so hopefully Plano will have a new addition in the forthcoming weeks.

With 10 minutes left, we moseyed to the garage before an AYG sprint to the top followed by some abs and 10 burpees to remind the PAX who YHC is. Somewhere in this endeavor Special Sauce mentioned that someone should’ve had a Go-Pro because the beatdown would’ve triggered some heavy FOMO for Alright Alright. Hopefully word of mouth and this garrulous backblast will accomplish the same thing. PAX finally corralled back at the flag for a 1-minute plank hold while time expired and we reunited with the rest of the crew.

Sauce clocked us in at 4.35 miles on the morning, which brings us back to some comments made this morning. Last night, YHC mentioned wanting harder workouts in the mornings to which people responded that others can’t keep up. If anything can be learned from YHC’s Amazing Race, the 220+ Burpee Beatdown, and today it’s that people can. We had a six today, but they were never left in the dust. Everybody completed every rep of the workout, and we did it together. While you certainly aren’t required, YHC would challenge Q’s to find one workout and do everything you can to beat the living shit out of the PAX the best you can because it makes us all better (you’ll also appreciate the schadenfreude). If 200+ burpees are the hardest part of your day, then YHC will argue that’s a pretty good day. And by now, unfortunately, every single one of y’all have proven that you can do it.

The two groups reunited giving Ant Man a hard time for being out and Chairman made a right-hand joke regarding a post-Valentine’s day CSAUP event. During the Name-O-Rama, an elderly scout woman walked into the circle and asked for directions. The Scouts were hosting some convention/meeting on SMU’s campus. One of the PAX gave the most nondescript directions telling her to “walk in that direction and eventually you’ll find them”. Sex Panther then offered to give her a ride. 5 minutes later, we could only assume that Sex Panther had EH’d this woman for some personal reasons, but he drove his truck back solo and joined the group as it made its way to Bubbas.

-2nd F this coming Friday. Harass Ultra for details
-CSAUP event February 15th

Just Wait ’til Next Week


Ant Man, Gold Digger, Pow Pow, and Rump Roast joined YHC in the gloom. Attendance was piss poor, but we had a good time once we all found each other. Rest of y’all wait till next Saturday.

SSH x20
IST x20
Cotton Pickers x10

Tha Thang:
One partner does burpees while other partner backwards runs up two levels of garage until they’ve done 100 burpees combined.

10 Burpees. Jog one ramp. Bear Crawl one ramp.
10 Burpees, 25 Merkins. Jog. Bear Crawl.
10 Burpees, 25 Merkins, 50 Lunges. Jog. Bear Crawl
10 Burpees, 25 Merkins, 50 Lunges, 100 LBCs. Jog. Bear Crawl
10 Burpees, 25 Merkins, 50 Lunges, 100 LBCs, 150 Squats.

Alabama prom dates x20
WWII SUs x15
Freddie Mercury x20
Rugby SUs x10
Flutters x20

YHC rolled up to an empty parking lot at 6:58. Gold Digger followed in soon after. After a brief discussion, we agreed to go to Bubba’s in lieu of a workout given the circumstances. Ant Man rolled in in Ant Man fashion, and he was on board with the plan leading us to stand in the rain for a second, grab a picture, and mosey off. Ant Man made the point of checking the parking garage for PAX who went there instead and lo and behold we found Pow Pow and Rump Roast. (always wait by the original AO unless otherwise instructed by the Q).

We ultimately got started a little late, but everyone drudged through the burpee heavy workout. Not too much mumblechatter during the workout itself, but we had 100% attendance at Bubba’s afterwards.

Baby Ant Man is doing well. Rump Roast made a comment that the first couple weeks of parenthood give you a false sense of security, which instilled some fear in Ant Man.

Pow Pow informed YHC that EY’s paternity leave policy is 6 months now, so watch out ladies…I’m looking for that PTO. We also raised the question as to how many months you’d get if you impregnated two separate women at the same time.

Silence of the Lambs

PAX: Aaarrrggghhh, AlrightAlright, Chairman Mao, Eli, Pepper, Rump Roast, Sex Panther, Special Sauce, Teasip, Walmart
QIC: Coach K
AO: Glencoe Park
Disclaimer: Given

SSH x20
IST x20
Cotton Pickers x10

Tha Thang:
Indian Run x1/2 mile
50 merkins
Bear Crawl x100 yards
50 squats
1 mile run
50 squats
Bear Crawl x100 yards
50 merkins
Indian run x1/2 mile

Mumblechatter (or lack thereof):
YHC rolled up with the usual energy. Rump Roast came in hot at 0530, bass bumping. Some words were exchanged, but that’s about it for the mumblechatter on the day. PAX were forced to run or count to themselves the entire morning…the travesty. When Alright Alright and Teasip noted the absence of mumblechatter, YHC made a comment about wanting some quiet time this morning to which PAX responded as if that was different than any other morning. Fair point.

Alright Alright somehow bruised the top of his foot over the weekend. PAX weren’t too thrilled to bear crawl through a slightly muddied football field. Special Sauce asked if Wet Wipes would be provided but quickly recanted after YHC threatened to do Tunnel of Love. Not one word was mentioned about the game last night as our sole UVA fan was at work and Tech fans have returned to hiding.

After the workout, Rump Roast made the bold statement that he’d prefer to do 100 burpees rather than do this morning’s workout, which will be remembered for future Qs. PAX were quick to suggest he do burpees in lieu of Katy Trail Thursday this week.

1. Q Source tomorrow night at CFA on Hillcrest at 1800
2. Master’s charity event Wednesday night at a country club at 1730 (sorry Aaarrrggghhh, I forgot the specifics)
3. Q Source Friday at 1130
4. Happy Hour Friday
5. Third F event at Bonton Farms Saturday (talk to Chairman Mao for details)

F3 Mental Health Day

PAX: Aaarrrggghhh, AlrightAlright, Ant Man, Chairman Mao, F150, Ina, Myspace, Oatmeal, Princess Turtlehead, Sex Panther, Special Sauce, splash, Spread, Stingray (FNG) Teasip, Thunderlips
QIC: Coach K
AO: Caruth Park

*Due to anonymity concerns, stories/NMM have been removed

PAX were instructed to arrive 5 minutes early this morning, and all were present right on time. F3 Nation dedicated workouts today to raising awareness about men’s mental health, specifically suicide and depression. Given that most suicides are middle-aged men…it’s something we can’t keep ignoring.

Tha Thang:
Dirty Mc-Cuss Word of Choice

Two full suicides: start short for the first one; start long for the second
Burpees x10
Hand-Release Merkins x12
Burpees x10
E2K x12
Burpees x10
Lunges x12
Burpees x10
Plank Jacks x12

Repeato 2 more times
Burpees x9

All in all – we did 129 burpees, one for every person that will kill themselves today.

As with most of YHC’s Q’s, mumblechatter was restricted by the nature of the beast. splash promised us a burpee-free Q next Wednesday. AlrightAlright broke the tension with a penis joke on the “start short finish long” suicides. Him and Special Sauce tried making a truce on the third round of suicides, which fell through pretty quickly. Spread was the only one man enough to embrace the final 9 burpees without whining. Princess Turtlehead reminded the PAX that I warned everybody it wasn’t an ideal workout for a new guy. Disclaimer was given. Some moans and groans throughout as PAX figured out the pattern, but I definitely wouldn’t rank this amongst the worst of my Qs.

We wrapped up with the naming ceremony of our FNG Craig, now Stingray. He’s from Mississippi, owned a copy of “Flaming Lips” as his first CD, and was a journalist in college. Welcome, sir.